What are you looking for in a new job? Looking for jobs provides a unique opportunity to either refine what one has been doing or to explore something new. Many people I have talked with who are searching for a job struggle with determining what they want: ranging from new graduates just entering (or reentering) the job market to people discontented with their current work. In addition, I have seen even more people, even those completely confident in what they do but for whatever reason lost their current position, struggle to articulate what they are looking for to potential employers.
This is a self-reflection activity to address both of those: think through what you want to do and articulate it concisely and passionately to others. It helps form your vocation, not only guiding what kind of positions you look for but also illuminating your overarching story you will tell others during interviews.
| Step 1 | List out five activities that you have done in the last few years that inspire you. |
| Step 2 | List out five activities that you have done in the last few years that have drained/frustrated you. |
| Step 3 | For each activity on both lists, then write out what about it inspired you and what about it drained you. |
| Step 4 | Look through both sets of lists for common features. |
| Step 5 | Synthesize these common features into a one- to two-sentence story. |
| Step 6 | Tell this story to others who are close to you and practice it when appropriate with others. |
Here is how it works:
Step 1: List out five activities that you have done in the last few years that inspire you.
An activity can be just about anything you have done: a job, a course you have taken, a specific project you have worked on, a hobby or pastime, volunteer activity, something you have done with family or around your home, and so on.
By “inspire,” I mean that the activity gave you energy, galvanized you, motivated you, gave you passion or inspiration, or otherwise gave your life and fulfillment doing it. This likely meant that you enjoyed the activity, but it is something deeper: that the activity gave you positive meaning/purpose, energy, motivation, or fulfillment, more than simply being fun. You felt alive while doing it.
These activities may overlap: for example, you may mention both an overall job you held that inspired you and a specific project you worked on in that job that was especially fulfilling, or both an inspirational course you took and a particular project in that course that was particularly motivating. Just about anything you have done could be an activity.
Step 2: List out five activities that you have done in the last few years that have drained/frustrated you.
Like with the five energizing activities, these may be just about anything and may even overlap with the previous list (e.g. a job might energy you overall but a part or aspect of it might have drained you). By “drained/frustrated you,” I mean the exact opposite: instead of energizing or galvanizing you, it sucked the life out of you, maybe leaving you feeling depleted, frustrated, or empty.
Note, however: Draining and frustrating you is not the same as simply tiring you. We often feel tired after doing any intense activity, whether we enjoy that activity or hate it. For example, I love playing basketball, but after playing for several hours, I will feel tired, even though I still felt stimulated while playing. Often being tired is simply the result of a full day’s work, and often many activities that fulfill or motivate us make us especially tired as well because we do them enthusiastically. An activity that drains or frustrates you takes motivation or passion from you while doing it: maybe feeling like it is sucking something out of you to complete.
Step 3: For each activity on both lists, then write out what about it inspired you and what about it drained you.
Yes, I mean write out both what inspired and drained you for the items on both lists. For the inspired activities, likely listing what about it inspired you will be easier than listing what about it drained you. But, even the most amazing activities have something about them that drained you. Thinking about both the good and the bad of each activity is crucial to self-reflect on what you want to do. Since these activities have been inspired for you, the pros will likely outweigh the cons, yet some cons must almost certainly exist.
Likewise, for the activities that drained you, list out both what inspired and drained you even if the latter outweighs the former.
I typically treat this like a brainstorm session writing out whatever comes to mind. For each activity, I make a column for inspired and another for draining and list out as many aspects I can think of for each as they come to mind.
Step 4: Look through both sets of lists for common features.
Take some time away from the list, maybe a day or so if you can. When you are ready, reread it, analyzing for common themes. Are there any common patterns to what inspired you between the activities? Are there any patterns in what drained or frustrated you?
After initially looking through it yourself, feel free to show the list to someone or a couple people who know you well: like a spouse, other family member, or close friend. Ask him or her what patterns he or she notices and what he or she thinks of your patterns.
Before giving your thoughts, I would recommend first asking your confidant what patterns he or she notices, simply listening and taking notes, without commenting much. Then only after he or she is finished share the ones you found and ask his or her take on those. That way you can hear your confidant’s initial thoughts unhindered before you influence his or her perspective by telling your own.
Write all these patterns out: both what you noticed and what anyone else you showed it to noticed. Then see whether there are any common features between you guys. Feel free to list those out as well.
Step 5: Synthesize these common features into a one- to two-sentence story.
Your next step is to organize these different features into a story: determining what the various items on both lists have in common and synthesizing these into a cohesive whole.
Here are a few potential questions to ask:
- Are there any similarities between what energized you, like similar types of activities that gave you energy? For example, maybe many of the activities that inspired you involve working and communicating with others, or solving a complex problem, or developing or organizing something, or logical or analytical work, a technical skill, and so on.
- Likewise, are there any similarities among the activities that drained you? Maybe one of the types of activities I gave in the first question frequently drained you?
- Are there any connections between the activities that energized and drained you? This is often the case. For example, for me, coming up with innovative ways to solve complex problems energizes me, but following repetitive procedures often drain me (see my next article, where I will do this activity myself as an example, for more detail). These are flip sides of the same coin: Developing innovative and unique strategies energized me, and its opposite, following rote procedures, drain me. Likewise, see whether any of the inspiring and draining themes mirror each other.
Now synthesize these themes into a cohesive one- or two-sentence story about who you are and what you like to do. Think of this as like a thesis statement for an essay, summarizing the main points of who you are in a way that you can go into more detail on if someone’s interested.
My explanations might use the following types of sentence structures. Feel free to use these as inspirations to get a sense for how to structure your ideas succinctly, but if you have other ways of phrasing it, that is fine as well:
- “I have a passion for _, but I get frustrated when _.”
- “_ gives me energy.”
- “_ makes me feel stifled.”
- “I tend to appreciate roles that involve _, _, and_.”
- “I should avoid roles that involve _, _, and _.”
To do this, I typically employ the following strategy:
First, I talk it out with a friend or family member (likely the same person or people I shared my notes with for Step 4) or, if need be, by myself. I start by simply explaining all the items on the list one by one.
Second, without looking at my notes, I describe myself completely from memory to my friend/family member. I pretend that I am introducing myself in an interview, starting with something like, “Hello, my name is Stephen. I am passionate about…” Then I analyze what I changed when I spoke off script: What made the cut; how did I phrase things in the moment, what seemed the most important to talk about, and so on?
Typically, the first time I introduce myself, it never comes out right. Maybe I begin a certain sentence but realize mid-stream that I need to start over and phrase it differently. If that happens to you, that is fine. The first time you do this often feels awkward, but working through the kinks of your spiel out now in front of a trusted confidant or by yourself is much better than stumbling through your words in a job interview for a role you really want.
I then go through that self-summary a few more times until I have a better sense for what to say. If I began one way but had to correct myself, or if I stuttered through a part, I repeat it again and again until I phrase it the way I want, and I am confident in my delivery.
Once I have my spiel, I then cut it in half. When I have done this exercise with others, I often notice people’s spiels are around two-three minutes and about twelve or so sentences. Awesome, there is a time for such long descriptions – like that infamous first question in an interview, “Tell me about yourself.” But, for now cut it in half. If you used twelve sentences, now use six or if you took three minutes, now say it in a minute and a half. Practice that a few times until you feel confident.
Then, once you get used to that shorter length, cut it in half again. Repeat this until your explanation is one- to two-sentences and/or no more than thirty-second long. That is your synthesis summary. Make sure you write it down and feel free to practice it until you can give it in your sleep. This will form the backbone of how you describe and sell yourself to employers.
Finally, think through what types of roles would match this: inspiring you while avoiding to the greatest extent possible what frustrates you. Some energizing passions lend themselves to certain positions and industries (or to avoiding others), but in my experience at least, many positions could match someone’s passions in multiple industries or fields.
Instead, it primarily tells you what you what to look for in the organizations and positions you consider. For example, if you are a data scientist, this tells you what type of data science job might work for you (or if you are considering leaving the field, what types of positions in any new field you might consider entering).
Your synthesis provides the criteria of what to look for in whatever industry or field you are considering. Thus, this will be what you communicate to others when talking with them about potential jobs.
Step 6: Tell this story to others who are close to you and practice it when appropriate with others.
This summary forms the backbone of the story you tell others. When you network or go into a job interview, you will use this to describe yourself to others, so make sure you practice it until you can give reflexively. You can practice it by yourself, but I at least generally prefer practicing in front of others: friends, family, or the first people you network with so that I can see how other people respond and adjust what I say accordingly.
Feel free to develop a few different degrees of explanation in case you need them: a 10-second description, 30-second description, 1- to 2-minute description, and even a 3- to 5-minute much more detailed monologue. You will use different ones depending on the social situation and their degree of interest. In a future article, I will discuss how to describe yourself compellingly in more detail.
For now, pat yourself on the back: You did a lot. This self-reflection is crucial for determining what kind of role you want going forward and providing the narrative skeleton of how you present yourself to others. Such intense self-reflection can be taxing work, but it is ultimately worthwhile.
Photo Credit #1: Pexels at https://pixabay.com/photos/fountain-pen-note-notebook-page-1851096/
Photo Credit #2: StockSnap at https://pixabay.com/photos/people-girls-women-students-2557396/
Photo Credit #3: Allan Rotgers at https://www.flickr.com/photos/122662432@N04/13740073235/in/photostream/
Photo Credit #4: kaboompics at https://pixabay.com/photos/young-woman-girl-lady-female-work-791849/
Photo Credit #5: Kelly Sikkema at https://unsplash.com/photos/-1_RZL8BGBM
Photo Credit #6: 742680 at https://pixabay.com/photos/chalkboard-story-blogging-believe-620316/
Photo Credit #7: Christina at https://unsplash.com/photos/LQ1t-8Ms5PY
Photo Credit #8: Verteller at https://pixabay.com/photos/people-adult-woman-male-coaching-3275289/